Grace Prep High School, located in State College, Pennsylvania, takes its senior legacy projects very seriously. A student’s project is meant to last the entire senior year, so if they do not pick something they are passionate about, they are up a creek without a paddle. Senior projects are challenging with a lot of pressure, but they harvest an enormous amount of growth and give a taste of what life after high school is like. Since my family has been a foster care family for the past five years, I knew that I desired to work with the Foster Care System of Centre County in some way. After much thought and deliberation, and many project proposals to my headmaster, I finally came up with a project that would challenge me personally, but would also reach out to the community and hopefully leave a legacy.
My project consisted of two parts. The first part was to work with a girls’ group home called Stormbreak. Stormbreak is connected to the Foster Care System of Centre County through the Youth Service Bureau. At first I thought I would work on the house, raise money for activities for the girls, and help make their lives at Stormbreak a little brighter. After meeting a few times with the girls, though, it became very clear that my focus would not be on the physical house, but on building relationships with the girls and giving them opportunities to forget about their worries. A few times each month throughout my senior year I went over to their house, and sometimes they would come to mine. Each time we got together, I would plan an engaging and fun activity to do with them. We would make s’mores, carve pumpkins, play outdoor games, make cupcakes, or sew hand bags. Often these gatherings involved dinner. I wanted to provide the girls with opportunities to hang out and be creative. A few times my family and I were invited by individual girls to join celebrations for birthdays, or “graduation from the program” parties. This project has given me new friends, and these new friends have taught me more than I ever imagined. I have learned that these girls are normal teenagers who were just placed into situations that were out of their control.
The second part of my project was quite unexpected in the beginning. During my final project proposal in October of 2012, my headmaster asked me how many kids or teens were in the Foster Care System in Centre County and how many Foster Care families were available to take care of these children and teens. To my surprise, I could not answer that question even though my family had been providing care for kids and teenagers for so long. We came up with the idea for me to make a short Foster Care promotional video with the help of Daniel Barron, a Grace Prep freshman at the time who was much more educated in the area of film than I was. This video would consist of statistics and interviews with people involved with the system. I researched relevant statistics and interviewed two foster care families, a case worker, and a college student who was in the Foster Care System at the time. While I was in the process of making the video, I contacted various churches across Centre County to ask if they would allow me to come and share my video and my family’s Foster Care testimony. The whole goal of sharing this video and my family’s story was to raise awareness for the system and recruit more Foster Care families. Throughout the year, including this fall, I spoke in ten different churches, at the Annual Foster Parent Appreciation Banquet for Centre County, at the Every Child Needs a Champion Event held by a group of Penn State University students, and at a Centre County Commissioner’s meeting. So far at least one family decided to become a foster care family after seeing my video. Even though it was just one family, who knows how many lives will be changed as a result of that family’s decision. Most of the time, if not all the time, families need to be presented with the opportunity of becoming a foster care family multiple times before they make their decision. I hope that giving my presentation was one of those instances.
This project started during my senior year of high school, but it is far from over. The Foster Care System is something that I am passionate about and I will always be involved with to some degree. Not only are there not enough Foster Care families in Centre County, but all over the United States there is a shortage of available families. We have so many wonderful and blessed families in and around our communities; it is a struggle for me to understand how we can be sending kids out of the community they know because there is a lack of Foster Care families in their local area.
All of this being said, fostering kids and teenagers is not easy. My family has had its share of stories, three of which I want to share. We had a young boy stay with us a few years ago who was wonderful for the first few months, but his situation eventually made him angry and rebellious. We know that even though he had to leave our home, seeds of love were planted in his life during his time with us. We got to share with him what it means to be in a large family, to see the ocean, to learn how to tie his shoes, and to ride a bike.
My family, three years ago, also took in three little girls, just hours after they had been pulled from their own home. They were scared, reeked of cigarette smoke, and two of them had significant speech problems. I will never forget the terror in their eyes when they first walked through our door. They spent a month with my family, and it was amazing to see how love can transform a child. These girls finally felt safe, loved, and like normal little girls. While they were with us they played dress-up, danced around the house, baked cookies from scratch, and got to go to school consistently. From our home they went to another Foster Care couple who could take care of all three girls and be their forever home. It was a long three and a half years, but the girls were finally adopted by the couple in the summer of 2013. These girls have an amazing story of victory. Since being in the Foster Care System these girls have thrived and are doing so well! They have gone from not knowing their ABC’s and 123’s to either meeting or exceeding their grade level requirements.The story that is dearest to my heart is the story of my new little sister. Meghan was given to us when she was six days old, weighing a tiny five pounds, nine ounces. It was love at first sight for my whole family. Like any Foster Care situation, Meghan’s was complicated, but after a challenging road, we had the opportunity to adopt her in May of 2012. Life is unexpected; my parents never expected to have one child in college and one still in diapers, and I never expected to be in the grocery store with my baby sister and have strangers compliment me on my adorable “daughter.”
Growing up in a family that provides care for kids and teens in the system is not easy, but it is so rewarding. I honestly think that becoming a Foster Care family was one of the best decisions that my family has ever made. If I could give any advice to any family that is considering becoming a Foster Care family or who is already a Foster Care family, it would be to just simply talk openly and honestly with your own kids first. I personally don’t want to know everything about a new child’s or teen’s situation, nor should I know everything. But as long as I can be open with my parents and share my feelings, I am more ready and willing to take in a child or teen. Always make sure that every family member is on board with the new foster situation you are receiving into your home. It has to be a family decision, or it will not work well at all.
The day that my parents told me they were thinking of becoming a foster family, I honestly thought they were crazy; we were already a very active family of six. Now I know why we made the decision. It was to love these kids and teens and to give them the family opportunities I had and sometimes still do take for granted. The past five years have been an amazing, fulfilling, challenging, crazy, difficult journey, but I wouldn’t change anything. This project is not over for me, as many doors continue to open for more opportunities to reach more people. Never in a million years did I expect to be writing an article for a Foster Care magazine about my project and story. I hope that this inspires, encourages, and challenges people across our nation to stand up and make a difference in the lives of children and teens in the Foster Care System. The bottom line is that kids need families, and we have the power to fill that need.
Owner/Editor - Chris Chmielewski